Tuesday, February 3, 2009

I Need To Be Sent To My Room

I wanted to post yesterday but I've had a bad case of the snarkies so I thought it best to keep my thoughts to myself. I'm snarky because of minor work crap so it's no biggee. It's just that I've been bleating like a pregnant goat at dinner time for over a year now that our service department is broken. Well, the proverbial fecal matter is hitting the air handling device. But I'm not one for I-told-you-so's.

That's a bald face lie. I'm SO not above saying that.


Since I have nothing NICE to say I will post a meme today. I rarely do these anymore but this one comes via my lovely friend Smocha

Have you ever...?

Gone on a blind date?

* He said he was blind but he excused himself during the salad course and never came back.

Skipped school?

* Welcome to the 'Brad Cxxxx Commemorative Detention Hall'

Watched someone die?

* Yes, the Ex, many times while trying to do stand up comedy

Been to Canada ?

* The drinking age is 18 (2+2= )

Been to Mexico ?

* Si senor. Met a scuba diver on a coral reef. Lost my swimming trunks.

Been on a plane?

* Honestly? Not since 9-11 - I've always hated to fly commercial aircraft. My Dad had a Cessna when I was little - I'm oddly just fine in small planes.

Been lost?

* Where am I ?

Been on the opposite side of the country?

* Opposite of what?

Gone to Washington, DC?

* Yes, it was the first time I was ever a minority. VERY interesting.

Swam in the ocean?

* I'm a Pisces. I'd shrivel up to a dry husk with out the ocean.

Cried yourself to sleep?

* Of course, I'm human. But the bastard wasn't worth it.

Played cops and robbers?

* Yes, I like taking prisoners.

Recently colored with crayons? .

* yes, but now I have to paint the wall.

Sang Karaoke?

* Never gonna happen...

Paid for a meal with coins only?

* I don't think so, But I know I can live for a week on a dozen eggs and a bag of potatoes.

Done something you told yourself you wouldn’t many times?

* I got over that once I realized I wasn't growing hair on my palms.

Made prank phone calls?

* Do I have your phone number ?

Laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose?

* Define 'beverage'

Caught a snowflake on your tongue?

* There is nothing fun about this question. Moving on.

Danced in the rain?

* Not sure about dancing, but mud puddle wars are the best! - the muddier the better.

Written a letter to Santa Claus?

* I sent him to collections.

Been kissed under the mistletoe?

* I don't kiss and tell, Jay reads this thing.

Watched the sunrise with someone you care about?

*Yes, Jay, many many times.

Blown bubbles?

* yes, but not up and down the I-405 corridor like SOME people.

Gone ice-skating?

* I'll be in the lodge by the fire with a toddy.

Been skinny dipping outdoors?

* Where else to you get the nickname 'Nubbin'?

Gone to the movies?

* Been in two! (extra)

Saved someone’s life?

* Nope, but Jay's saved mine more than once.

1. Any nickname? - (Numbers? Now we have numbers? Isn't this like question #17?)

* Grandma called me Bradberry, Stepfather called me Hamburger (I lost mine in a drive-in once, got quite upset, and was discovered to be sitting on/in it.)

2. Mother’s name?

* Palmer, same as my middle name

3. Favorite drink?

* Iced Tea, I gave up the Long Island variety.

4. Any Tattoos?

* Ooohh I wish!

5. Body piercing?

* I'm going out with the same number of holes the good lord sent me in with.

6. How much do you love your job?

* Ahem, Don't make me go snarky on your ass.

7. Favorite vacation spot?

* Fav. that I've actually been to? Cozumel - Dream vacation? Carpathos.

8. Ever been to Africa?

* Still waiting for C.C. @ 'Six Months of Settled'. to send me passage to come be her house boy!

9. Ever eaten cookies for dinner?

* Is there a Nanny cam in my kitchen?

10. Been on TV?

* Let's just not go into that, shall we?

11. Ever steal any traffic signs?

* Hell no, those signs were there when I bought the place. Really.

12. Ever been in a car accident?

* Never while I was driving, but I once had to walk through a windshield.

13. Drive a 2-door or 4-door vehicle?

* Bear's jeep is a 4-door

14. Favorite Salad Dressing?

* Blue Cheese please!

15. Favorite Pie?

* My momma's apple pie.

16. Favorite Number?

* 7

17. Favorite Movie?

* 'Giant'

19. Favorite Dessert?

* Jay's Rhubarb Crisp

20. Favorite food?

* Lasagna

21. Favorite day of the week?

* Friday

22. Favorite brand of body wash?

* Ivory soap, as in bar of -

23. Favorite toothpaste?

* People have a favorite toothpastes?

24. Favorite smell?

* Eucalyptus trees - I grew up with one - need to plant one in my yard.

25. What do you do to relax?

* Reading

26. How do you see yourself in 10 years?

* Retired or at least working part-time. Jay & I can go live off the Ex in Hollywood for a while. (Bruce? You reading this?)

27. How many siblings do you have?

* One full sister, three stepsisters - one 1/2 brother

28. Furthest place you will send this message?

* So all the sudden I'm sending this somewhere? Blasted nerve-y meme...

29. Who will respond to this the fastest?

* Mailer daemon@abccompany.com

30. Who is your favorite dog of all time?


Have you EVER read this blog?

Favorite Dog? - You have GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!


Donna said...

I've seen that meme many times, and even done it a couple times. But I believe your answers are the funniest I've seen.

Kathy said...

Thanks, I needed that. It's been really quiet around here today and you made me laugh!

Smocha said...

No wonder I love you so much. A sarcastic after my own heart:)

I'll have to email you later about some of those answers.


meno said...

Scuba diver? Lost swim trunks?

Well, i'm all hot and bothered now.

Gin said...

I'm cracking up at the scuba diving and losing your trunks!! Wahahahaha

~K~ said...

First time visiting your blog...I must admit, you made me laugh, ALOT!! I will now be a stalker..!

mama llama said...

YOU are funny. I SOOOOO needed that this morning!

Be well, Brad (giggle)

tt said...

yep...my first laugh of the day...great start. Thanks babe!

Real Live Lesbian said...

What a great read! LOL

*I* have a eucalyptus tree in my yard!!!! You need one, too!

C.C. said...

Funny! These are the best meme answers I've ever seen!

Brad, you and Jay are cordially invited to come stay with us in Africa. You do not even have to be our houseboy. Our steward would not like being displaced, and besides...you have to have someone serve you lasagna and iced tea while you're here!